How to: Love & Support Your Working Spouse
When both partners work, there is an undeniable need for supportive interactions between spouses. At times it can feel like compromises are everywhere to make it work. Here are some helpful tips and reminders for husbands with wives who work outside of the home.
Know that mom-guilt is real.
We have come a long way in our society regarding working moms, but that does not mean that mom guilt is gone completely – there will still be days where your spouse may feel guilty for having to get on a conference call instead of meeting you with the kids for lunch or a field trip. If you can be there with your child send your wife pictures of the kids engaged in activities or text the score of the baseball game, this will help her to feel like she isn’t completely missing out.
Know that she is sometimes torn.
Regardless of how much your wife loves her job, I can guarantee you at times (and probably often) she is torn between loving her work and her passion and the want and need to be a regular presence in the home.
Praise her efforts.
I have never met a woman who didn’t enjoy hearing what a great job she was doing. Some women value this more than others and can be a massive change in your spouse’s attitude if they are feeling praised and appreciated. If your wife’s love language is words of affirmation, then this is a must.
Have open and honest conversations about the division of duties.
Chances are there are some tasks that each of you despise and some that you don’t mind. Have a conversation about those and split the responsibilities accordingly. Sometimes things at work (for either of you) will mean that these tasks are neglected, but if both partners are working outside the home, then home life will be more harmonious and balanced if the household chores are shared. If you have the income to outsource household tasks, then that can help to keep things done at home no matter how busy things are at work.
Take pride in her success.
Do not think of her success as a burden. Be proud of her success don’t be full of too much pride to celebrate her!
Without support from her spouse, your wife cannot be her best at work or home.